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July 09, 2009

1876: Zappos delivery

Ashley: only one not completely horrible thing has happened today: I received shoes from zappos.
it's a reason to go on
Chris: here, here!
Ashley: but I have stopped having any sort of positive feeling about their faux-spontaneous upgrading of my order to overnight shipping.
DON'T LIE TO ME ZAPPOS
Chris: now you've done it. they will ship your next order by box turtle
Ashley: oh noes
I can just imagine it, slowly crossing in front of my office window
taking hours to make it to my door
Chris: and scraping at it pathetically.
whining like only a turtle can
Ashley: I think it would disappear for a while in the space between the window and the door, which would make it impossible for me to do any work
I'd be sitting there, just willing it to inch forward
so I could see its bitter little face peeking around the doorframe
Chris: he's gonna bite you!
or eat your sandwich! that's what they do!
Ashley: no, I know what to do: you jump on them and they go ricocheting around into large, green pipes
Chris:ha ha ha
Ashley: I GOT SMALLER!
Chris:bloop bloop bloop!
Ashley: a flute!! racooooooon!
Chris: thank you ashley, but your order is in another castle.

Posted by ashley at July 9, 2009 05:38 PM

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