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March 05, 2008

1456: Panic

This morning was one of those particularly annoying mornings, in which the 6 line was totally FUBAR. Employing a logic which is anything but logical, the trains sometimes switch from running local (making all stops in Manhattan) to running express (making only selected stops) in an effort to get back on schedule. The decision to make this switch is really only determined by just how inconvenienced you would potentially be by this change; if it would screw up your commute and force you to wait for another train... well, it's going to happen. I don't know what sophisticated technology they employ to determine the level of your potential frustration in order to make these decisions, but they're really good at it. I only wish they'd turn their clever minds to the task of actually making the trains run time.

The NYC subway system does kinda/sorta run on a schedule, although this is really only evident during off hours when there's less train traffic clogging up the system and the trains can come and go when they're supposed to. If you only rode the subway during rush hour, you might not know anything about this schedule because the volume of people riding the subway and their collective stupidity slows things down to the point of a train arriving in your station being only a matter of luck. A train might show up and you might be able to get on it, riding to your intended destination without incident. A train might show up and be too crowded to even let you on. A train might show up and not even stop to let you in because it's been switched to "express," and chosen to bypass your station. A train might show up, letting you in, and then make the switch to "express" after having taken you some distance in the direction of your destination. Who can say what's going to happen when you set foot on that subway platform? It's like roulette, except the only thing you can win is a shorter but no less aggravating ride to your job. Hell, sometimes the subway doesn't even run at all and no one can get to work -- everyone loses then! PWND!

Today wasn't that bad. I got on at my station and despite having to climb over some dim-witted kid in order to get into the middle of the train where no one but a crazy old man was standing, I didn't have much trouble. The crazy old man kept bouncing up and down, and for whatever reason, had chosen to stand right in the middle of the aisle and up against my back. To avoid his constantly bumping into me, I had to crowd the people seating in front of me, although they were thankfully indifferent to this situation. When the crazy old man kept bashing into me, I would simply shift my bony arm out at an angle that caused my painfully sharp elbow to jut out and into the back of his giant, puffy coat. Being an old crazy man, he was oblivious to this but it was a better option than turning around and freaking out at him -- tempting as that was.

As we neared Grand Central, the conductor announced that our train would be "going express," and that we should get off and change trains if we needed local service. Everyone groaned, of course, although this really isn't a terribly big deal and there's not really any reason to vocalize your displeasure because doing so doesn't really affect any sort of change.

We stepped off the train into a massive crowd of people already on the platform and already inconvenienced by the train delays that ultimately resulted in our train's change in service. We waited for the next local train to come, and in a few minutes' time, it did. It came to a halt and the doors opened to let people off. And then, just as quickly as they'd opened, THE DOORS SLAMMED SHUT! People on the platform were as alarmed as the people on the train, now unable to exit. The doors opened again. And then they closed again. This happened over and over again, slamming shut on people who tried to squeeze their way out. Alarming! And then the train took off.

When another train pulled into the station, I got on and listened to this...

Posted by ashley at March 5, 2008 10:24 AM

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