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April 24, 2007
1139: "Dear Corey"
Shoshi sent this earlier:
OK, TV fans -- here's your chance to ask '80s teen heartthrobs Corey Haim and Corey Feldman anything! They return to the tube this summer with a new reality series on A&E, but they will also be guest columnists on MSN, and you can ask them anything. Seriously. Got a question about your relationship? Ask them. Need advice on breaking into the acting biz? Ask away. Want to know what it was like to work with Kiefer Sutherland? Ask them, already! The best questions will be featured in the column and answered personally by each Corey. So, go ahead, Corey-maniacs, ask away: askcorey@microsoft.com
Truthfully, there's nothing I want to ask Corey Haim about. Corey Feldman, however, is another story. As you'll see in the following, he's obviously something of an incredible human being...
"The purpose of Corey Feldman is to try and bring a little laughter, a little peace, a little love."
It is? Oh. And all this time, I thought it was to pantomime old school Michael Jackson moves with startling skill and accuracy. What a let down!
In any event, there's still a lot I'd like to learn about from Corey Feldman. For one thing, I'd like to know if he's been in touch with Tarantino because Pete and I really think there's great potential in a partnership between those two. Perhaps Feldman isn't humbled and grateful enough to accept Taratino's help yet, but just look at what he did for Travolta (before Travolta threw it all away) and Daryl Hannah (ditto... kinda). In the future, whenever Tarantino is tempted to cast -- say -- himself in a bit role, he should just substitute in Feldman. *ding!* *ding!* *ding!* We have a winner! I'd rather see Samuel L. Jackson scrubbing brains out of the upholstery of a car in Corey Feldman's garage any day.
Edited to add: Ladies and germs, it is my pleasure to announce to you that The Incredible Amoeba has approved the motion to cast Corey Feldman in Tarantino's next project. Principle photography is to scheduled to begin as soon as both Feldman and Tarantino get over themselves, and will take place in an abandoned tortilla factory in East Los Angeles. We are in talks with various film starts of the 70's and will announce further casting decisions as they are made. No script has been written or approved, but we have the greenlight to begin penning a remake of Dog Day Afternoon. We have a budget of $28 for a taco lunch for the crew. The working title for this project is "Back2Basics" or "Project: FINALLY!" Watch this space!
Edited, again, to add: Exciting news! We've secured Corey Haim to play "Bloated Corpse #4" and we're meeting with Paul Reubens' people later this week to hammer out a deal that could make him our hero's love interest -- fingers crossed! William Fichtner has signed on to play "Bad Cop #2" and Tom Sizemore will play "Man in the Airport."
Posted by ashley at April 24, 2007 12:09 PM
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