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November 10, 2004

110: VENOMOUS POLITICAL RANT... but not the one you're expecting.

It pains me to have to get "all political" but it's impossible to refrain from commenting on this.

"Sorry Everybody" is a website which annoyingly proclaims the following:

"Some of us — hopefully most of us — are trying to understand and appreciate the effect our recent election will have on you, the citizens of the rest of the world. As our so-called leaders redouble their efforts to screw you over, please remember that some of us — hopefully most of us — are truly, truly sorry. And we'll say we're sorry, even on the behalf of the ones who aren't."

The pain caused by my eyes rolling up into the backs of my eye sockets is so excruciating, it passes all human understanding. These jerks send me into such a rage... I can't even tell you. These are the same people who go to Europe and try to "pass" as Canadians -- the kind of fools who apply Canadian flag patches to the expensive backpacks understood by Europeans as "bags of Abercrombie clothes belonging to an American kids, just here to screw around for six months and come back with a fake sense of appreciation for European girls... I mean culture."

Clearly, this guy wrote (and rewrote) this "apology" with the intention of impressing us with his handwriting and maybe getting a date. Pathetic! And no woman trusts a guy who writes like a chick. (Nice wimpy piercing, too. Creed fan?)

These are the kind of Americans who go abroad and apologize to the locals for being American. Disgusting! How impressed would you be if a foreigner came to your town and made a similar apology with respect to their own culture and political leaders? You wouldn't be impressed at all; you'd think he was a twerp and you'd be right. I don't want these people claiming to speak on my behalf -- I voted for Kerry (or more accurately,"Not Bush") and it hacks me off to have anything to do with these presumptuous nerds.

As if it weren't insulting enough to their fellow Americans, these people are giddy when a non-American responds with a similar photo and message... ACCEPTING THE APOLOGY. Oh, shut up!

There's a lot of reasons to be unhappy Bush was reelected -- changes in the Supreme Court and its decisions, continued complications in the handling of military actions overseas, etc. Having to cope with a deluge of idiotic "apologies" shouldn't be among these reasons.

And while I'm at it... I'm sick of this "blue state" versus "red state" crap. Just because a state's electorate votes went to one candidate or another, it doesn't mean that the ENTIRE STATE went in for him or that you can assume to know what that state's population is all about. I hate that so much of our country is dismissed as simply being "fly over" territory.

What kind of pig are you, if you can be so ignorant and presumptuous about your own country, let alone apologize to the world on our behalf? If you want to apologize to someone, because your life is so empty that you have to latch onto abstract causes like you're Susan Sarandon, why not apologize to the portion of the population whose votes weren't ever counted? I don't mean to sound like a conspiracy theorist, and it's likely that the uncounted votes wouldn't have changed the outcome, but the lack of a uniform, 100% accurate voting system is problematic. If we saw this system being used elsewhere in the world, we'd trash it and pity the nation that relies on it! Apologize to the people whose votes were never counted! Sitting around bellyaching solves NOTHING; put down the digital camera down and do something with your worthless hide.

Pitying the rest of the country while ignorantly assuming to know their background, religious leanings, or brain capacity does not make you a better American -- it makes you a jerk. And if you no longer feel proud to be an American, who's stopping you from leaving? I'm certainly not -- you're just one less slow moving, wannabe vegan (leather watchbands do count, idiot) in my way whenever I'm at Whole Foods. Jerk.

Posted by ashley at November 10, 2004 12:39 PM

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